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Friday, May 1, 2009

Being a cool mom doesn't mean to set your kids free without boundaries, but it is important to give your kids room to move and learn things for themselves. This will help you to enjoy parenting and help your children to enjoy being raised. It's a win-win situation.

Let them speak, try to understand them and listen to them. Let's say your kid got a boyfriend or girlfriend. Try to face it well and make sure you talk to your kid about it and motivate them with it. But of course, make sure to tell your kid not to trust all people of the opposite sex. Sometimes let them throw a party, when you think that's all right, but tell them that's on condition that they don't do anything that you wouldn't like, as doing drugs, drinking alcohol or sex.Make sure they know that they can speak up and give their opinions about your family life, but not to control YOUR life. For example: let them know if you have met someone interesting.You could raise their allowance when they do something you think they deserve. Give your kids a break, don't stress them with too much pressure about anything . But sometimes talk to them about school and others of his responsibilities, and make sure you show that you really believe in your kid's potential.

Always give affection, such as a kiss or a warm hug, but try to not suffocate them. Try to comfort your kids in the best way when they have a problem, show that you're there to help and try to know their problems and don't get upset in any case, but try to help in the nicest, most responsible and fairest way as possible. Learn to listen to your kids. Ask your kids about what makes them embarrassed, so you could make a list of things that you should avoid to do to don't make your kid embarrassed in front of others. Make suggestions, and don't demand that they do something. I.e., "Ugh. your room is really REALLY messy today. Would it harm anyone just to create a path of little resistance on the floor?" is better than, "Clean up your room now or you're grounded."don't let the only time you speak to your kids the time when you yell at them because that is the person they will always remember you as. inspire them! Never, ever say in response to a reported bullying "Just ignore them". This never helps!

Be a good listener. Try to be always calm and nice, but still be firm and put authority without being aggressive. Give your kids a chance and don't stress them.But make sure you show them what's right to do, but let them speak up and give their opinion. Sometimes, have a peaceful conversation with your kids and try to solve any problem. Like, if someone is doing something the other person doesn't like it. Make sure you have a conversation with them, so you and your kids can come up with good ideas to make your life better and more peaceful. in their teens use good judgment but also have a little faith and trust them, give them some freedom. they are good kids, you raised them so,they should be! always cook a separate dish for your rebellious vegan kid so she has something to eat at dinner. The word is cool, so be cool in the sense like don't freak out or panic or jump the gun

Let them have freedom in moderation, set limits to them, but don't be over protective sure their your kids but they aren't babies you need to let them make their own mistakes. If you have any argument with your kid, try to play it cool, understand his side and don't scream.Just calm down. Try not to do what you wouldn't like your kids to do. Like, going out with someone and coming back home too late. Your kids will think that's unfair and will do that.Try to make any rule you set to them, be a little of yours. Think of your kids. set rules and stick to them, consistency is key! if hes grounded for a weekend really make sure that your point gets across or else they will know you don't mean business.

3 Comments:

  1. Dorothy L said...
    I love this post. I have raised 4 + and I also learned that listening even when you want to scream is a very good way to deal with teens and earn their trust. Never close the doors of communication!
    Have a great day!
    LIZZIE said...
    Yeah, I think this is a very good way of raising ur kids. For moms who don't understand why their kids are not obedient or listening to them should try this out. Even the soon-to-be moms or those who haven't plan yet should also read this. Thanks for this good post. Reminds me so much of how my mom raised me n my brothers!
    Cascia said...
    Great tips! My kids are not teenagers yet but my oldest is almost there. She's 12. She's already resisting my hugs and kisses. I probably should back off a bit.

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