Friday, August 7, 2009
We often feel sadness over occurrences in our lives that we have no control over. Perhaps a best friend moves away, or maybe we experience the loss of a family member. Not all of us know how to express our feelings. Some cannot talk it over with parents, and some just think that hurting themselves is the only way to express their inner feelings. There are other ways for us to express our grief.
First of all, know that crying is not a sign of weakness. Let out your tears! Bottled up emotions lead to more emotional breakdowns in the future. Crying not only cleanses the eyes, but washes the pain away. (Note: This is a metaphor. Crying does not literally wash away pain.) Keep a diary. Each time you're feeling down in the dumps, write a journal entry about it. When you're feeling better you can look back at the entry and think, "How did this pain make me stronger?".
Find someone to talk to. Find someone you trust. If you feel comfortable talking to them and if they can listen to you, understand your pain, then they are the right person for you to turn to. Try to get to the source of the sadness. Is it due to a person in particular? If so, avoid that person. If one person is the source for your depression, then it's not worth talking to him or her. Work through the reasons that provoke your crying. If you are jealous of someone, try to figure out if this reaction is really worth feeling sad about.
Allow time to grieve. If sadness is due to the death of someone close to you, then it may take a bit longer for the sadness to pass. It is healthy to feel sad at the loss of a loved one so understand this and take one day at a time. Crying is perfectly normal at a time like this. Talking about it and expressing your feelings will also help. Use art to free some of your pain. It can be a poem, a song or a painting that describes what you're feeling and going through. Muster the courage to feel what actually exists inside you; the courage of an open heart. If your sadness is related to a family member passing away, do not forget them, but keep memories of them [pictures, home videos, favorite songs, etc.].
If you feel that the only way you can get relief from your pain is by hurting yourself, try following the above suggestions. Try talking to a parent or best friend and maybe then you'll feel relieved. You should write an entry into your journal daily, even if the sadness is less. This way you can get a handle on your feelings and thoughts before you get very sad again.Crying sometimes helps. You sometimes feel better after a good cry. Just keep your chin up!
This article is mainly aimed towards sadness! If you are angry, there are other solutions. Be mindful of those around you while venting (listening to loud music, striking an object, et cetera). You don't want to accidentally take your anger out on an innocent bystander.